A man who lived a very bad life dies and goes to Hell. A demon greets him at the Admissions desk and scans his paperwork.
“Based on your resume,” the demon says, “I can offer you two choices of how you’ll spend eternity.”
Before the man can ask any questions, the demon sets off down a hallway. The man follows. Soon they come to a door with a small glass window.
“Here’s option one,” the demon says and gestures for the man to look in the window.
Inside he sees a freezer full of naked people. Their skin is blue, their teeth are chattering and icicles hang from every part of their bodies.
The man shudders. “Oh, please,” he says. “Not that. I hate being cold.”
The demon nods and proceeds down the hall to a second door.
Inside this window the man sees a roomful of people standing around in brown slime up to their ankles, drinking cups of coffee.
“Ugh,” the man says. “Is that…?”
“Yes,” says the demon, “it’s shit.”
The man thinks about it for a second and then sighs.
“That’s pretty disgusting,” he says, “but I really hate being cold. I think I’ll go with this one.”
The demon nods and, pulling a key from his pocket, unlocks the door.
Just as he opens it, a bell rings and a voice inside the room yells, “Coffee break’s over, back on your heads!”
* * *
So, the purpose of this joke (there’s always a purpose here at the Chronicles, however tangential) is to let you know that I’ve found gainful employment.
On January 5, I will start work as the Office Manager at a clinic. It’s different from the jobs I’ve held for the last 30+ years, being both less technical and much more people-oriented, and I’m looking forward to the change.
The work day doesn't start until 9 a.m., and since I get up at 5, that still gives me time to hit the gym and write in the mornings. (Novel is coming along very nicely, thanks for asking.)
So, I guess my coffee break’s over.
Time to get back on my head!