Thursday, January 7, 2010
Old Joke #26
A man arrives home later than usual after playing golf.
"How did it go today?" asks his wife.
"Terrible!" he replies. "Harry had a heart attack on the fourth green."
"Oh my God," says the wife. "That must have awful."
"You're telling me," he says. "All day long, it was 'hit the ball, drag Harry, hit the ball, drag Harry.'"
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Yeah, that's old alright.
ReplyDeleteHere's one.
Two men are golfing when a funeral cortege can be seen on a nearby road. One of the men takes his hat off, puts it over his heart and stands real still to honor the dead. The other golfer says, "That's real nice of you to pay your respects like that." The reply from the first man, "Well, I was married to her for 40 years."
Funny. Both old jokes are funny. I enjoyed them so. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteI have to add to this!
ReplyDeleteA golfer is in a competitive match with a friend, who is ahead by a couple of
strokes. The golfer says to himself: "I'd give anything to sink this next
putt."
A stranger walks up to him and whispers: "Would you give up a fourth of your
sex life?"
The golfer thinks the man is crazy and that his answer will be meaningless
but also that perhaps this is a good omen and will put him in the right frame
of mind to make the difficult putt and says, "OK." And sinks the putt.
Two holes later he mumbles to himself: "Boy, if I could only get an eagle on
this hole."
The same stranger moves to his side and says, "Would it be worth another
fourth of your sex life?"
The golfer shrugs and says, "Sure." And he makes an eagle.
Down to the final hole. The golfer needs yet another eagle to win. Though he
says nothing, the stranger moves to his side and says, "Would you be willing
to give up the rest of your sex life to win this match?"
The golfer says, "Certainly." And makes the eagle.
As the golfer walks to the club house, the stranger walks alongside and
says, "You know, I've really not been fair with you because you don't know
who I am. I'm the devil, and from now on you will have no sex life."
"Nice to meet you," says the golfer. "My name's Father O'Malley."
Ha! That is an old one but good.
ReplyDeleteHey! It's a lot of effort to get through 18 holes of golf (er so I'm told). Didn't know before now that it was such a contact sport.
ReplyDeleteBut seriously, you ARE trying to make me shart with these jokes, aren't you.
That isn't an old joke- it's the oldest joke!
ReplyDeleteFunny!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm married to a golfer.
ReplyDeleteThey do take themselves a bit seriously don't they?
Hope all is well with you.