Saturday, August 6, 2011

Drivers, Stop Farding!

So I'm waiting at a red light on Friday morning and I notice that next to me, in the turn lane, all the traffic has gone, except for this solitary black Nissan.

I glance over to see what gives and realize the driver is talking on her cell phone. Ahead, the light turns yellow, but, absorbed in conversation, she doesn't notice.

Then I see, in addition to a cell phone, this chick has a makeup brush in her hand. So she's not only talking on the phone while she's driving, she's also applying cosmetics.

The upshot of this extreme multi-tasking is when she finally looks up, the light is turning red. She guns it and zooms through the intersection under the crimson beam, making everyone else wait on her.

Naturally, I'm still bitching about this when I get to work and Dave-Who-Knows-All across the aisle says, "Oh, she was farding."

"No idea," I say. "Both of our windows were up."

"No," he says, "farding. It means applying make-up."

So I pulled it up on and sure enough, it does.

So, to drivers (male or female) who insist on applying their make-up behind the wheel, I say this, "NO FARDING BEHIND THE WHEEL!"

(Photo by Xavi Talleda.)


  1. Thank goodness I have you to pass on this information to me, or I would so be in the dark...I was well know for farding on the way to work, back in the day! :) I have the speaker phone talking down...although I am afraid of getting cancer in my chest...I know...

  2. I once saw a guy driving along the I-70 east of Denver reading a paperback by holding it up on top of the steering wheel.

  3. Thanks for the fun post! Most women women do this, unless they are in their 70's. They are slaves to the workplace makeup world. I love their slavery because it affords me entertainment in the morning. All that prissiness transforms the traffic light waits into fantasy world. The only thing more exciting is when they are nervous and smoke. Hope God isn't really watching me on my way to work.

  4. Sorry Stephen, even gals near 80 do the farding thing. A lifetime habit is a hard thing to break and at 80 I mean lifetime.

  5. I hate to think about how I would find my pack of cigarettes in the bottom of my bag, find my matches, strike a match to light my cigarette, all while manually shifting gears

    That's just bad in so many ways isn't it.

  6. I do it when stopped at red lights but I'm always careful to start driving again when necessary and put all cosmetics down! Sorry!!!

  7. my makeup only looks good if i do it in front of a real mirror with few distractions. if my makeup isn't done before i leave the house then it's going to be a makeup-free day. no farding here!

  8. So. Let me get this in perspective.

    Women who drive and put on makeup at traffic lights generate absolutely NO concern that men like me may be looking into their eyes through their rear view mirror framed morning performances?

    Or is it that the men you see watching you are simply anonymous?

  9. farding who knew, I am so glad I have people like you to enlighten me:)


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.


Related Posts with Thumbnails